What if 90% of the intensity we feel in a marital argument has almost nothing to do with what just happened? Jim and Meghan sit down with Dr. Peter Malinoski, clinical psychologist and co-founder of Souls and Hearts, for something completely different: a live, guided exercise into the unconscious patterns that shape how we react to the people we love most. Using Internal Family Systems therapy, Dr. Peter walks Jim and Meghan through a real conflict from their own week, uncovering how childhood wounds still echo in their marriage today. With honesty, humor, and real vulnerability, this episode reveals how understanding our internal world can transform our external relationships.
What’s in this episode:
Dr. Peter's background in Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy
Why so much of our present conflict is rooted in unresolved past pain
A live, in-the-moment exercise walking Jim and Meghan through real conflict
The backstory behind a tense night over dishes and a sick cat
How childhood wounds around "not being enough" resurfaced for both hosts
Saint Thomas Aquinas on grace, nature, and the good we're really seeking
The connection between unresolved patterns and purgatory
A simple, priest-taught practice for apology and forgiveness
Resources Mentioned:
Souls and Hearts – Hundreds of resources including courses, podcasts, and Catholic human formation communities
Resilient Catholics Community – A community for individuals, couples, and families doing deep human formation work
Formation for Formators – A community supporting the human formation of priests, therapists, coaches, spiritual directors, and seminary formators
Interior Integration for Catholics podcast – Dr. Peter's podcast; episodes 157-159 explore Internal Family Systems in depth